Confrontations of a Mom-to-be

Hey Kid,

I first spotted you as two red lines on the test kit. My heart leapt with sense of accomplishment. We were trying to have you from past few months and each denial from God seemed like a bite of reality; that you cannot really plan your fate and somethings are actually destined.

So living with hope of being lucky, I used to wait each month for you. This time was different though, they say your body speaks to you so connect with yourself; decipher the signs. So here is what happened, Two weeks before spotting you through preg. Kit, my body signalled me of your arrival. The intense rage of heat, which I never felt before, caught me off-guard. Hot flashes they call it, Am I menopausing?? I got afraid. Oh!! You are quite fertile – my period tracking app reminded me. Then what is it? Is it signs of what I am longing for? Is it the game of twisted hormones to pave way for my sweet kid? Apprehensive and unsure, I waited and waited; counting each day while somewhere being sure that it’s an arrival knock of you.

Impatient as I am, I could not hold it to myself and said it all to your father. Calm and composed as he is, he reassuringly asked me to wait a bit more. Now, here I was excitingly waiting for my period dates to pass; abiding by the google law of letting another week to go.

Day-35, Still no signs of period – O yeah!!.. Early morning I got up alone to finally find an answer and there you were.. sending a big Hello!! With Two bright lines. From that day till today (being in 3rd trimester), Each day has been different – A journey of mixed-up emotions, messed-up body system, Love and hatred.

All this while, I reserved myself of not writing anything. Maybe I don’t want to jinx it but now is the time when I shall tell you of our journey together. Accounts of our bonding; how certain days were difficult and others were bliss. How no one else mattered but just you..

I do not want to be trapped in guilt of telling you unpleasant experiences as well; so a disclaimer beforehand. It is not going to be an all-good story as a mommy can have her dark side too. Starting today I shall write to you nine such notes; each of it depicting one month. Stay with me and let’s weave together a tiny net of our story...